[THE TEXAS CHAIN SAW MASSACRE
screens Friday October 9th and Saturday October 10th at the Aut-O-Rama Drive-In as part of Retro Halloween Weekend. Gate opens at 6:00 pm. Movies start at 7:30 pm.]
An
appreciation by Bob Ignizio
I don't particularly want to review THE
TEXAS CHAIN SAW MASSACRE (and
yes, when we're talking about the original 1974 version, “Chain
Saw” is two words - that's the way it's spelled in the opening credits). Don't get me
wrong; I love the film. In fact I think it's probably the most
important, most intense, and most entertaining horror film of the
modern era. But what am I going to say that hasn't already been said?
That it's actually not very gory (seriously, it isn't)? That the set
design by Robert Burns is brilliant and plays a crucial role in the
film? That star Marilyn Burns gives perhaps the most convincing
portrayal of onscreen terror ever seen, and that Jim Siedow, Gunnar
Hansen, and Ed Neal are so effective at playing homicidal maniacs
that you wonder if they might not actually be that way in real life?
That the film also has a wicked streak of black humor and social
satire? All that is true, and it's all repeated ad nauseum by other
writers, so why rehash it here?
What
I'm going to do instead is talk about one aspect of THE
TEXAS CHAIN SAW massacre that I
have a particular fondness for: the brilliance of the film's
marketing. Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's probably been analyzed countless
times as well, but I've gotta' write about something. Besides,
talking about how the film was promoted gives me a chance to bring up
its Cleveland connection.
First
of all, the importance of the film's title cannot be underestimated.
As far as exploitation movie titles go, it doesn't get any better
than THE TEXAS CHAIN SAW MASSACRE. It's both a promise and a threat, depending on your point of
view. For those seeking lurid thrills at the drive-in or grindhouse,
it was like a siren's call. For the guardians of public decency, it
all but guaranteed a public outcry, which in turn all but guaranteed
that more people would go see the film.
Just
as important as a great title for an exploitation movie is a great
poster, and CHAIN SAW
had the good fortune to be made in the decade when the movie poster
art-form was at its peak. I don't even have to mention such high
points as the STAR WARS
or JAWS posters; can
you name one poster in the last three decades that's even half as
cool as your average seventies movie poster? Didn't think so. Anyway,
the poster for THE TEXAS CHAIN SAW MASSACRE
is right up there with the best in promotional artwork the seventies
had to offer. First of all, the artwork is just plain gorgeous in its
hideousness. And like the movie itself, it seems to show much more
than it really does. Suggestion is everything here, and one can
imagine all kinds of horrors stemming from this one moment frozen in
time.
And
let's not underestimate the power of the ad copy, either. “Who will
survive, and what will be left of them?” - now that's
a tagline, people. That in and of itself would be more than enough to
seal the deal, but the poster goes on, in true P.T. Barnum ballyhoo
fashion, to make the claim that, “What happened was true. Now the
motion picture that's just as real.” Yeah, not quite. Like Alfred
Hitchcock's PSYCHO,
CHAIN SAW
was loosely inspired by the Wisconsin murderer Ed Gein. Very loosely. Let's say 5% inspiration, 95% bullshit.
Now
in the golden age of exploitation movies, having a great title and
poster was about all you really needed. But CHAIN
SAW
director Tobe Hooper went the extra mile and actually made a good
movie. Since I'm not actually reviewing the movie, I only mention
this because having a good movie helps a lot when it comes time to make the trailer. It's not necessary, but it does help.
Anyway,
the trailer for THE
TEXAS CHAIN SAW MASSACRE
is a real doozy, and this is where the Cleveland connection comes in.
Aside from presenting an almost perfectly edited selection of
highlights from the film, the trailer features a voice-over
performance by Ernie Anderson. For those who don't know, Anderson was
Cleveland's original horror host under the name Ghoulardi. Later he
moved to Hollywood and became one of the biggest announcers in the
business. His son is Paul Thomas Anderson, director of THE
MASTER,
THERE WILL BE
BLOOD,
and BOOGIE NIGHTS,
among others. Ernie was probably best known for saying, “tonight on
the Looooove Boat” and handling announcing duties on “America's
Funniest Home Videos”, but he also did voice work for movie
trailers, and he's certainly in fine form here. Like I said, this
isn't a review of the movie. I'm not going to try to convince you to
see THE TEXAS CHAIN
SAW MASSACRE
or not. Instead, I'll leave it to the power of Ernie to persuade you.
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