The swiftest garden snail can cover 27 inches an hour, under optimal conditions.
The supercharged slug in Dreamworks’ new TURBO clocks in at over 220
miles per hour—fast enough to qualify for the Indianapolis
500.
The cartoon sports comedy from
the makers of MADAGASCAR ,
KUNG FU PANDA, and SHREK chronicles the adventures of Theo / Turbo (Ryan
Reynolds), a misfit mollusk who toils with his brood in a suburban tomato
patch but dreams of life in the fast lane—literally. He watches NASCAR footage on TV in a nearby
human garage and idolizes smarmy Guy Gagne (Bill Hader), a
French-Canadian driver who insists “no dream is too big” on the old videotape
interviews.
Theo’s brother Chet (Paul
Giamatti) wants his speed-obsessed sibling to accept the limitations of
their species and content himself with cultivating overripe veggies like
everyone else. Chet’s the resident snail
safety director—but even he can’t stop the occasional crow from swooping in and
making a meal out of one of their clan.
He’s a play-it-safe snail who, unlike impetuous Theo, is quick to
“tuck-and-roll” into his shell at the first sign of peril.
Theo wanders out alone at night
after a heated exchange with the dream-dashing Chet, wishes upon what he thinks is a star, and gets stuck to the
hood of a tricked-out dragster motoring down a viaduct. Whisked into the intake manifold, his DNA
is altered by the nitrous oxide coursing into the engine. Upon regurgitation from the monstrous
machine, Theo discovers he’s assimilated all the hallmarks of a revved-up
hotrod: His eyes light up like
headlights, his rear end flashes red, the calcareous whorls in his shell glow
blue, and he broadcasts radio hits by Tom Jones, Run DMC ,
and Pitbull.
And he can achieve velocities
that border on light speed in the stalk-like eyes of the other snails.
Acclimating himself to his new
powers, Theo outraces an “evil lawnmower” and a shell-crunching human toddler
on a big wheel but still can’t endear himself to the other snails. When Chet is abducted by a hungry crow, Theo
streaks to the rescue—but both are captured by Tito (Michael Pena), a scheming human
salesman who races snails for fun when not minding a taco stand with his
brother, Angelo (Luis Guzman). Fortunately,
Tito’s a kindly keeper whose lofty aspirations mirror Theo’s own—and whose sibling
proves as much a party-pooping pragmatist as Chet.
Theo also makes some new aspersan
(er, snail) acquaintances who appreciate
his talent. The wily Whiplash (Samuel L. Jackson), silly Skidmark (Ben
Schwartz), bubbly Burn (Maya Randolph), laid-back Smoove Move (Snoop Dogg), and
whimsical White Shadow (Michael Bell) are already accomplished stunt snails who
navigate pavement, power lines, drain spouts, and billboards for kicks.
Hoping to boost business by
racing Theo in the Indianapolis
500, Tito talks his neighboring Starlight
Plaza proprietors into anteing up the
hefty entrance fee. Then he commandeers
the taco truck and heads east with all his motley human and snail companions in
tow, angering Angelo and chaffing Chet. But
infiltrating Gasoline Alley is only half the battle: The protagonists must also convince Indy Car
execs to let Theo race with human-driven cars, overcome myriad raceway
obstacles, and win the support of both Chet and Angelo whilst competing against
an arrogant, energy drink-shilling champion.
“Your powers could run out
tomorrow, Theo,” observes Chet on race night.
“What then?”
“Guess I better make the most of
today,” chimes the titular hero.
Nevermind that these snails speak
English, comprehend human conversation, and get a chance to vie for pole position with Mario Andretti-like speedsters.
This is kids’ stuff, after all, and a ticket purchase confirms one’s
willingness to accept first-time director David Soren’s ridiculous
premise. Get past Theo’s miraculous
metamorphosis, and TURBO is a fun ride—an underdog story with built-in lessons
about subverting expectations, safeguarding one’s individuality, and
actualizing dreams against all odds.
It’s mish-mash of A BUG’S LIFE and CARS ,
with a pinch of BAD NEWS BEARS: BREAKING TRAINING for seasoning.
Reynolds and Giamatti have done
better, but their cartoon chemistry here is solid. The bond / rivalry between Pena and Guzman is
likewise credible and comedic. And the
supporting cast brings life to Starlight’s oddball shopkeepers, each of whom
contributes to the realization of Tito’s and Theo’s grandiose goals in his or
her own way. Michelle Rodriguez plays a
no-nonsense mechanic, Richard Jenkins sells model hobby kits, and Ken Jeong
voices an eccentric elderly female nail salon owner. The laughs and aw-shucks moments are
well-spaced, the images kinetic and bright (especially the CGI sequences at Indianapolis Motor Speedway), and Henry Jackman’s score
appropriately brisk. The soundtrack also
features retreads of hits by House of Pain (“Jump Around”) and Survivor (“Eye
of the Tiger”).2 ½ out of 4 stars.
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